Why can I have a good relationship?
I am in general what I have read that a woman wants. I have a good job; I am dedicated, never cheated, and very romantic. I would always have flowers for them. Wake up in the morning and I would say I love you.
I think that my problem is that I have a high sex drive. It gets me upset because all the girls that I have dated at the beginning they tell me that they will never let me out of bed, and then it gets old. Then they tell me that all men are like that. Why don’t they listen? My philosophy in life is to always tell the truth!!! What I say I mean. Eventually all my romance is gone from her side. The problem is that I still feel the same way I felt from the beginning of the relationship. So I am left high and dry. I fell like hugging and kissing my partner but I always get rejected.
I totally HATE rejection. For that I would stay single and approach all women. Is thinking this way wrong? I still have these feeling for her, but I cannot even touch her. Every time I mention about leaving, she says that she is trying to change. But I still feel this way. Why is life so complicated? I believe that if you really want something, then you would do what ever is necessary to obtain it, what ever that might be. If she really wants me, why she doesn’t do what it takes to keep me? I fell like I’m about to give up. Even sex is not the same. Virtually non-existent.
I am so sexually frustrated that I can even listen to my favorite music when it contains sexual innuendos, or my favorite movies if they have sexual situations. Don’t get me wrong; it is not all about sex. I sometimes feel like I want to cuddle together and maybe watch a movie. Maybe go and walk the beach together. Touch her face. Look into her eyes and tell her how much I love her and the kiss her with all the passion that I have inside. Just that, the touch and the kiss; but when I approach her, she pulls away and tells me an excuse. I am so tire of excuses. With all the excuses I have heard, I could make a book.
You have no idea how many times I have sit a though, would it be better for us if I left? The other day she told me that I could have a sexual fling anytime I want to with anyone I please as long as she doesn’t know about it and I come home after. Me have a fling? Believe me that the though have crossed my mind. It’s a guy dream that the person they are with would give them the green light to have sex with anyone they would please. But even if I wanted, no woman out there would want to have sex with me after finding out that I am in a committed relationship (committed. I wonder about the meaning of the word). But my better judgment tells me that such actions would make me the person that I hate the most, A LIAR! A CHEATER! All of the sudden I could become my ex-wife, A CHEATER, A person who left me for another. We have such a good sex live together that in the past she had call me to have sex with her. I had always refuse because I find such a though, repulsive. I just hope that I could make the right decision or I will surely go insane. Can anyone out there understand? Or this is just me? I am pleased to be able to use this blog to vent out all my frustrations.